As a child I recall going to Edgewater to see the fireworks with my Aunt, Uncle and cousins. I recall getting to go to the beach with the mother of a child who I babysat too. I also remember finding serenity up at the "Outlook" area to write journals and escape chaos as a teenager. I remember getting my license and taking my friends to the lake too. I remember collecting cool rocks with an elementary friend once too. It always seemed just a hop, skip, and jump away. Even as I live close to it now; it seems like another world away with life being so full of demands these days. I took a couple hours to take my daughter to Edgewater last night. While we got there around 7:10pm, we missed the main rush of people earlier in the day. The life guards were non existent. There were what appeared to be broken seashells or bones along the beachline where the water was splashing in from the waves. It was like shards of glass to your feet. The driftwood that is brought in by those same waves lined the perimeter of the coastline all the same. The sand was full of leftovers of all the above too. While a beautiful sunset settled in; my child enjoyed a few moments of swimming in the shallow water that went out to almost the boat line of less than 5 feet deep. That made it seem like she was in an ocean of water right at the edge of Lake Erie. As families left; lovers came in pairs along the coastline with their shoes in their hands. While the ladies seemed to be trying to hold back the pain of stepping on those shards of what nots; they clasped their date's hands. For a few minutes I went out into the lake water with my daughter. We walked to the farthest point which I could stand with my head above the water and she fretted over the fact she could not touch the bottom. So, very quickly she decided to go get her float ring. Soon, she had the float keeping her steadfast in the water and we tried to make our way back and forth to the beachline. Her giddy laughter and silliness in the water made me smile far beyond words. Soon, we took a break and moved out of the water to relax on the beach. As thoughts crossed my brain about beach time; it hit me that this was the last place her dad and I had visited before we found out we were pregnant. The memory of that peaceful night we walked on the boardwalk bridge and ate ice cream from the concession stand long ago brought smiles to my face....For only hours later a positive early pregnancy test changed our lives. I told her this sweet thought and she peacefully smiled. Soon, my daughter challenged me to "bury her in the sand" and I must admit that I thoroughly "hesitated" to feed her need for this seemingly "fun" adventure of getting buried in the sand. All I could think for a couple minutes was how filthy and dangerous it'd be to dig her into the sand considering all those shards. I was also thinking about our countless visits to this park with her dad and how many sand castles he had built with her before he had passed when she was only 7 years old. I also began thinking about how she had once buried her daddy in the sand....No he wasn't there with us today physically; but he was in spirit far beyond words. Ultimately, I ended up covering her in the cleanest sand I could filter from the sand. She was tickled pink with the cold sand wrapped around her body. Then in a moment she flinched, sat up, and ran into the water to clean it off her body.

When she returned from this trip into the water she realized that the life guard seat was vacant and there was a mound in front of it. Soon she was climbing on it and staring out into the beautiful sunset. It was a breathtaking moment seeing her in all her glory. As she enacted being a lifeguard, pretending to jump down and run to the shoreline to save someone only to realize it was one of those floats out in the water, and as she turned to act out the role of the lifeguard; she was distracted by the trains moving above Route 2 and she exclaimed that there are her "daddy's trains!" (He used to work at a place next to those trains; thus she associates them with him.) Luckily, she went on with her uninhibited behavior and enjoyed our limited time at the beach.

I thought about how much pollution and debris littered the landscape and why it was not cleared. I am sure it probably keeps coming in with each wave. I watched happily as the evening sunset continue to change with every moment. Beautiful shades of blue, pink, orange, and gray enveloped the horizon. Then, all at once, a beautiful beam of light came down and gleamed across the water directly behind my daughter....and I got to capture it with a photo.That was truly exciting as Olan Mills photos are far beyond our affordability.

As I sit and think about life, I remember that when my mom died in 2006 and my child was only 4 at the time: that the only way I could explain it to her was by taking her to the lake to watch the sunset and telling her that Grandma was the Sun & Moon and would be forever with us. For my child; being at Edgewater is part of her childhood... For me; it's strolling down deep memories of loved ones no longer with us like my Uncle, Cousin, Mom, and her daddy. It's heartwrenching and bittersweet. With my smiles, I hold back tears. Perhaps it's time to explore other tributaries in our world. The Rhine River in Germany was an awesome experience. I am certain that there are plenty of new places to explore which will not have my heart feeling so heavy. I will work to get my child to those places. Edgewater Park is now home to a HONEY HUT ICE CREAM STAND.... I don't know how long it's been there, but we were definitely unprepared for that...So, I shall have to make up an Ice Cream to her! Smiles.... http://realneo.us/system/files/IMG_20110724_202607.jpg http://realneo.us/system/files/IMG_20110724_202620.jpg http://realneo.us/system/files/IMG_20110724_203125.jpg http://realneo.us/system/files/IMG_20110724_200555.jpg