Submitted by Jeff Buster on Mon, 06/24/2013 - 20:04.

 My long time friend Charlie is the closest thing to James Joyce.   Brilliant. Empathetic. Expressive. Perceptive. Addicted. Always extremely hospitable. No Guilt. Crazy.

He has a huge vocabulary of experiences, and a memory like an elephant.
Here's one recent experience:
When Charlie got back from  a christening for his daughter’s baby in Florida, he wanted a drink.
That’s Charlie.
A drink, and a cigarette.
 At 9:00 a. m.
But I am off track…
When Charlie got back from Florida and got home at 6 in the afternoon he was tired and hungry and being on best behavior he hadn’t had many cocktails in Florida and so it was about time to have a Seagrams and Seven.
Charlie doesn’t leave his liquor out – he has room mates.
Before he headed to Fl Charlie had hidden a bottle of Seagrams behind his refrigerator.
When Charlie went to get it, it was gone and in it’s place was a bottle of VO with a liquor store tag on it.
The VO had a sales price sticker on it $10 more than the Seven.
Charlie was pissed.   Who had stolen his S&S and replaced it with a more expensive bottle of whiskey – which Charlie didn’t want.
 Charlie grabbed the bottle of VO and walked down the block and around the corner to see if he could exchange the VO for a Seagrams Seven at the tag liquor store.
Charlie, of course, knew Eddie the proprietor of the store.  But the proprietor wouldn’t budge.   No exchange – even though the exchange would leave $10 on the table for the liquor store.
But the answer was no.  No exchange.  Health rules….
Charlie went home and opened the VO, and poured himself a big, big drink.  His feet were up on the end of the couch...
Half way through the drink, the phone rang.
It was Eddie.
Eddie was really pissed…come down here Charlie he yelled, that bottle was stolen by your girlfriend’s sister, you asshole.
 Charlie walked back to the liquor store.
Eddie said to Charlie, came back here behind the counter, I have the store surveillance video – you can see your girlfriend’s sister shop lifting the VO.
When Charlie had innocently  (and unsuspectingly and ignorantly) offered to exchange the VO, Eddie had thought something was weird.  
Eddie went to the VO shelf, counted the bottles, looked at the computer inventory of the bottles of VO that had been sold, and came up one short.  One bottle missing.
Eddie, then went back through the CCTV surveillance and found  the frames where the VO had been stolen.
When I heard this story it stuck me as biblical. 
Because Charlie had asked Eddie not to sell his girlfriend any liquor.   Charlie’s girlfriend can get way out if she drinks.  
But Eddie was uncooperative – wouldn’t agree to refuse to sell to the girlfriend.   High gravity beer was her thing.
And domestic fights would result.
Now, however, Eddie told Charlie that if his girlfriend ever stepped foot inside the liquor store again, he would have her arrested for her being an accomplice to theft.
Charlie got his whiskey drink after his long trip back from Florida.
And, Charlie didn’t have to worry about his girlfriend buying local booze and getting aggressive.
Can you believe it?
A million to one chance…
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It all catches up with folks sooner or

I felt the same when cleaning out a thief's room; only to find a coin collection with all the certificates of authenticity and empty boxes in their room.....despite being caught...they blamed it all on the dead guy....interesting.

Always Appreciative,